Emergency services were called to Stameen last night after a dog walker found a shivering Shanks chained to a water pipe behind Stameen housing estate. The veteran Councillor had been conspicuous by his absence during the water crisis. He is rehydrating in the hostipal.
It appears that Cllr. Shanks misheard a news bulletin about a burst pipe in Staleen while unpeeling some masking tape for a protest sign. The indefatigable mandarin then rushed to the scene to offer assistance. Deciding he was first on the scene, Drawda’s favourite politician chained himself to a pipe he found in the woods behind Stameen.
The Councillor soon realised his mistake but was unable to free himself having forgotten the key to his padlock and discovering there was no mobile phone coverage under the dense Stameen canopy.
“From that point on it gets a bit 127 Hours. You do what you have to to survive. Nobody is judging. We’d all do the same. At least I think we would,” said a first responder.
As well as the physical torture he endured, Shanks is said to have undergone psychological torture too. Being forced to endure the muffled groans of the annual Swingers AGM as they swirled around the woods must have been worse than anything in Guantanamo Bay.
It is not the first time Godfrey has chained himself up as a means of protest. He infamously set up a human chain to oppose the death mask of Oliver Cromwell being displayed in the town and once chained himself to a rainbow after a farmer said the rainbow had been harassing his cattle.
The Faa Side wishes Councillor Shanks a speedy recovery.