Back when there were public telephone boxes and The Faa Side could afford foreign holidays, we would call these phones in the hope that someone would answer. The odd time somebody would and you’d get chatting to them and the itch was scratched. There’s a beauty to the accent, a haashness. True, it doesn’t have the camp lilt of the Dundalk brogue and it lacks the callous thuggery of a denizen from the axis of evil (Laytown-Bettystown-Mornington) but there’s something about it.
There are few more pleasurable things on either side of the Boyne than closing your eyes and listening to the people of Drawda talk. There is a refreshing lack of airs and graces. They don’t seem to care that much what they say or where they say it. There’s the Drawda granny in the Lourdes who is sceptical of being treated by anyone whose people weren’t here when the Black and Tans were knocking about…
“Tell me now, do they have medicine where you come from doctor?”
“I can assure you madam dat I am a fully, qualified, medical doctah.”
“Nan! He wouldn’t be working here if he wasn’t.”
“Tell him to show me his qualifications or he’s not treating me.”
Then there’s the wives on the Ballsgrove bus worried that their husbands’ health might be a risk due to their chosen profession.
“It’s shockin’ cold Phyllis so it is. My Barry does be freezing’ after he gets in from the burglin’. I da have ta do two hoh wahur bottles forum.”
“But does he not be wearin’ gloves anyways Mary?”
“A’d hafta axim but I don’t tink so no.”
Drawda’s only playground is a great place for mums to unwind and share pregnancy stories.
“It was a shocking tuff pregnincy Marian.”
“Shaw I know. The sacrifices you do make faw dem. Day don’t realise.”
“She’s only a babby but she’s no idea about the fags yet.”
“Ah she will doh, give her time. And shaw lookit, at least yaw back on dum now buh.”
Often the default response to any news related to the town
“It’d be great for the town.”
“See there’s a new Lidl opening with a second floor Tom?” “That’d be great for the town.”
“I read there last week that they’re putting a toll on West Street but I might be wrong about that now Philip.” “A toll? That’d be great for the town. Oh no, wait. A toll? Shaw the money’ll go straight to Dundalk. [shakes head] Dundalk has the town @%£$ing ruint so it has.”