The Faa Side Christmas TV Guide

The pick of local TV this Yuletide. Better than it was last year but not as good as 1996.

Ignore your loved ones for a local reason this Christmas with the Faa Side TV Guide for the best things on the box this Xmas.

Put those minces pies in the microwave and twist open another bottle of cheap wine you think is good because you know nothing about wine. Then turn on the telly. Here’s the pick of the bunch this Christmas.

The Councillor’s Speech, Christmas Day, 3-5pm

A Drogheda Borough Councillor sups tea on a kitchen chair and recounts from memory all the potholes he has mended along with their geographical coordinates. 

Ghosthunters, RTE 2, 27th December 11pm

Reality TV at its most gripping as two pilled up scrotes spend the night locked in the old New Central with the lights off, two crates of Red Bull and a ghost. Contains scenes of a very sexual nature.

Time Travel with Fr. Steve Davis, BBC One, Christmas Day 11am

Join Fr. Davis from the St. Peter’s Holy Door as he travels back in time to see how Christmas was celebrated during the Famine.

Film: The Wolf of Narrow West Street, FilmFour, Christmas Day 10pm

A high powered executive from Yellowbatter turns into a vampire and develops a taste for blood and other men’s wives. Subtitled.

Documentary: When Greenhills was a baby factory, TV4, 30th December 9pm

1990s Past pupils Shirley, Sonia and Natasha are joined by their grandkids as they reminisce about the heyday of the Greenhills pregnancy scene. From the early 80s until the late 90s, Greenhills was a major contributor to Drogheda having the highest rate of teenage pregnancy in the industrialized world. Great fun.

Shanks’s New Year’s Hootenany, All channels, New Year’s Eve 9pm-2016

Ring in the New Year with town legend Shanks. Music from in-house jazz band Ham Shanks. Rural humour.

The Best of the Angelus, RTE One 6pm, daily.

Countdown of 2015’s best bongs.

Ballsgrove Nights, UTV Ireland, St. Stephen’s Day, 8pm

Drama in Ballsgrove as after a mix up down the pub. Olivia’s new perm makes Mandy jealous. Jealous enough for her to seduce Olivia’s toy boy cousint Degser? A ghost from the past returns. Two years after being gunned down on Marley’s Lane, Wayne reappears with vengeance on his mind and guns in his tracksuit. And has Grace’s spray tan come too late to save her marriage to Keith?

Time Travel with Fr. Steve Davis, BBC One, Christmas Day 11pm

Join Fr. Davis from the St. Peter’s Holy Door as he travels back in time to review the show he already done this morning to see how Christmas was celebrated during the Famine. Confusing.

History: How WW1 Shaped Local History, RTE One 29th December, 5pm

Students from Boomerang Café gang look at pics of local soldiers from The First World War and rate their hair styles. Will they pick up a few more tips? Must watch.

Gender Fluids, Drawda TV 30th December, 18.45

Local talking heads from the six major genders meet up in Top Shop to decide what their favourite Christmas drinks are. Adult & Teenage themes throughout.

Christmas Dinner at the Ambassadors, Channel 4, Christmas Day 2pm

Join the Ambassador and chums for a yuletide lunch as they pick over the carcass of a disastrous year for Louth GAA. The proof is in the pudding.

The Year Gone By Hai, TV3, 2nd January

A selection of single mums and stay at home dads who only read the local papers review international events and their impact on Drogheda. Issues up for debate include ISIS, the refugee crisis and that 32-year-old puddle in Laytown that needs dredging.